Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore
Directed by: Brad Peyton
Written by: Ron J. Friedman & Steve Bencich
Starring: James Marsden, Bette Midler, Katt Williams
It was shockingly easy for Lovejoy to convince his entire staff to go see the new Cats & Dogs film. Convincing them all to do a full review for the film proved to be much harder. However, he did manage to squeeze a single sentence out of each of them. Think of this as your furry version of Rotten Tomatoes.
Malin
One of the few sequels to exceed the expectations set by the original.
Tube
If you’re crazy about calendars with photos of dogs and cats dressed up like little people, then boy have I got the movie for you!
Rikoshi
Make no mistakes: it’s bad—lame humor, awful writing, a beyond-contrived premise, and a voice cast of celebrities clearly dialing it in for a paycheck between “real” projects—but to be fair, it’s not the worst movie Chris O’Donnell has ever been in.
Lovejoy
I wanted to hate on this movie, but the fact is that the kid behind me laughed his ass off the entire time, so any complaints I have about the piss-poor plot seem null and void.
Rolo
If your expectations are low, and you’ve had a bottle of wine, and you’re a huge fan of German Shepherd Dogs, this movie is guaranteed to slightly exceed your expectations!
Jakebe
If you want to see Bette Midler with fewer wrinkles or Nick Nolte with a better haircut, then this is the movie for you; otherwise, it’s a pretty boring talking-animal movie — and it pains me to say that.
So there you have it. Six grown-ass furries saw a kid film about talking dogs, and not one of them made a joke about neutering. You’re welcome, fandom.
CREEPERS.
PS- Rotten Tomatoes takes a short but highly relevant excerpt from a full review and presents it to the viewer as (or prefacing) a link to the full article. The technical term for this is a “snippet”. What you present here is barely even a blurb.
PPS- Everyone knows Chris O’Donnell’s worst film was “Mad Love”.